Ten Things of Thankful

I have several posts planned for this blog, but they are all in various stages of needing a little more research here or a bit of tweaking there. My writing brain is working at a slightly slower speed than normal, largely due to being more tired than normal. I have read that lack of sleep does this – well I didn’t read that is specifically slows your writing brain, but that it has more of an effect mentally than physically. A week ago today we were sweltering in New York, having spent several nights baking or freezing as the air-conditioning in our hotel seemed to have only those two settings. Perhaps not quite: it also had a bit noisy and deafen. The garbage collectors also had a deafen setting, especially when they came at 4am and reversed the whole way up the street.  (That is truly what it seemed like with its beep, bee-eep, beep bee-eep.)

After an overnight flight we returned to the land of no air-conditioning almost a week ago and usually I’d have shaken off jet lag within a couple of days, but in the land of no air-conditioning we have been having unusually hot weather. Therefore I have been waking in the night more often than I normally would, usually to the sound of one of our daughters creaking around in her bed or to the movement of my husband tossing off the quilt.

So my blog posts seem to be sprawling around Word and the WordPress Edit-Post box with as much lethargy as my teenage daughters have sprawled across the sofa this week. And therefore I am thankful to be taking part in a blog link-up where all I have to do is list 10 things I am thankful for. As soon as those half-finished posts have managed to pick themselves up off the sofa and get themselves into coherent order I will publish them. Meantime, here’s my list:

Actually, I have already dispensed with number one, but I’ll repeat it for the list.

1) I am thankful for Bloppy Bloggers, the Facebook group where I have met many other bloggers, and for Lizzie Rogers of Considerings who is hosting the Ten Things of Thankful blog hop.

2) This might seem bizarre after my little grump about lack of sleep, but truly I am grateful for all the sunshine we’ve had the past week, and even for the sticky heat of New York. (The latter even makes me grateful for our cooler climate.)

3) I am grateful that we could afford to make the Transatlantic trip to Boston, Cape Cod and New York. I love Boston; it is without a doubt one of my favourite cities in the world. If we lived anywhere other than where we do I’d like it to be Boston.

4) I am of course thankful for The Sedona Method and The Work of Bryon Katie, both of which have given me freedom and peace that a decade ago I never imagined would be possible.

5) I am grateful for my children. I came late to motherhood after infertility and miscarriage, so I never could take for granted that one day I’d have children of my own.

6) I am grateful for my miscarriage. Though it took me into the deepest depression I have ever experienced in my life, it also made a profound change in how I viewed life. Without it, I might never had been drawn to question beliefs with the Work or learned to welcome feelings and let them go. Without it, I am sure I would have been much less compassionate as a mother and as a person. And I knew this even as I was struggling through that depression all those years ago.

7) For the same reason, I am also grateful for the infertility I experienced before getting lucky. It definitely made me question some beliefs and climb down off my high horse. (Previous to this experience I thought people should just accept their lot and not bother stressing themselves with fertility treatments. I was fortunate enough to find acupuncture which worked for me.)

8) I am thankful for the wealth of choices we have in the western world when it comes to medicine. Without acupuncture and Chinese herbs I doubt very much that our first daughter would have been born. (If you are interested, you can read more about my experience with this here.) Without western medicine I’m sure our second daughter would not have survived her very early birth. In particular I’m grateful that in the UK we have the NHS, which provided all the care she needed free of charge.

9) I am thankful for my children in another way. I am thankful that they are like a mirror that constantly reveals to me the aspects of myself that I have worked very hard for decades to keep hidden. The more I see myself reflected in them and learn to love what I have repressed, the more life reflects love back to me.

10) I am thankful for everyone I encounter who in some way reflects back to me those aspects of human nature I would rather deny in myself. Taking the time to stop and notice when I react to what I see in someone else gives me the chance to love another part of humanity (and myself) some more. I also gives me the chance to see if I can practice what I preach. And it reminds me that I am am not alone, that we all share the same hang-ups, issues and fears, even if the way we express them differs. It reminds me that we are all just looking for love, looking to give it and receive it.

Comments

  1. This is an excellent post. Seems like you are blessed in more ways than one. Cherish your babies like this always. God bless!

    1. Author

      Hi Rainbow Hues, yes I am blessed in many ways. Thanks for reading and for your comment.

  2. Yvonne, thank you for linking up with Ten Things. This is so beautifully descriptive, I really felt as though I was there with you. I hope you get some really good rest and wake refreshed and ready to take on the day.

    I’m absolutely right there with you on your #6 and half of #7. Currently our infertility diagnosis is still set, and we’d need to get very, hugely, massively lucky to ever be natural parents. But we’ll see. The pain and depression I got drawn into after my second miscarriage are what began the battle for positivity and a change of attitude which begot this very blog hop.

    I am a firm believer in breaking the silence around miscarriage, sharing information on infertility and engendering compassion all round. I am glad you appear to be of the same mind – it pleases me that this blog hop has linked us up.

  3. Author

    Lizzi, thanks for popping by. It strange, but when I decided to join the link-up I didn’t really know which was your blog although I’d had a look at it a while ago. So I didn’t remember that you had had infertility and miscarriage problems. My list was just spontaneous, so quite a coincidence. 2 miscarriages must be hard to bear, and I wish you the very best.

    I have added a link to Number 8 of my list to an article I wrote about my experience with acupuncture helping me conceive. If you read it and want to know more, then we can “chat” on FB.

    And yes, engendering compassion is my aim in life. I don’t always manage it, but the more I live with that intent, the easier it gets to live it!

    1. Have you come across Our Land at Findingninee.com? Kristi takes guest posts there aimed at engendering compassion and empathy between people, offered by those who’ve in some way had an experience outside ‘the norm’.

      Thanks for the offer of acupuncture chat, but the problem is Husby’s endocrine system. Unless Chinese medicine thinks it can re-start a broken hypothalamus, I doubt it will be of much assistance, but it’s a kind offer, and I’d be happy to chat on fb anyway 🙂

      However you came to join us, I am glad 🙂 Pleasantly surprised that you’ve been to Considerings before, too 🙂 It’s tough, but no worse than What Other People Go Through, and that helps to keep it in perspective a little…

      1. Author

        Yes, I have read Kristi’s blog and agree it is great. I’ve read quite a few of the Our Land series. It’s such a good idea.

        Sorry, but I don’t know if Chinese medicine could help your husband. It could be worth a try. There have been randomised trials that suggest it is effective in fertility and miscarriage issues, which was why I suggested it, as well as that I am certain it worked for me!

        Your last sentence contains a lot of wisdom!

  4. I enjoyed reading your Post. Being Sunday afternoon, I am again appreciating the benefit of a deliberate 2 day bloghop. I am reading Posts from new people and familiar people, it has that feel of (in the days of print newspapers) sitting around late Sunday mornings with coffee and newspapers and a radio.

    I am actually ‘making the rounds’ here at the end of the afternoon, another one of the cool things about this blog hop… reading Comments on Relies to Comments on Posts… lol

    1. Author

      Hi Clark, thanks for including me in your rounds! I haven’t got to everyone this week, but there’s always next week…

      You are right though, this blog hop is a great way to meet new people, and people with lots of gratitude are a joy to meet!

  5. Isn’t it interesting how we can be thankful for bad things that happen to us as well as be thankful for the good ones? Earlier today, I was thinking about making that the theme of my next 10 Things of Thankful, and now I think I will!

    1. Author

      Hi Dyanne, yes, it is interesting how so often what has seemed like a “bad” thing in my life has turned out not to be. I’ll look forward to reading your list next weekend!
      Thanks for your comment.

  6. My mother-in-law was without air conditioning for years and years. I understand that difficulty in sleeping through the hot nights. Hopefully it cools down soon so you can all get some solid shut-eye.

    It’s very interesting that you are thankful for your miscarriage. I can understand it completely. I have had two miscarriages. But I have also had 6 perfectly easy, wonderful pregnancies. Without the miscarriages, I would be clueless about how to support friends through their own losses. My losses have helped me become a more compassionate, thoughtful person.

    Thank you so much for linking up with us this week. I so enjoy hopping around to read others’ lists. My weekend is brighter because of them.

    1. Author

      Christine, I whole-heartedly agree with what you say about miscarriage: it made me more compassionate too.

      It has cooled down a bit with us, or else I’ve got used to it! Thanks. And thanks for your comment. I agree that this is a great hop, and hope to read more blogs next weekend!

  7. I loved that you found things to be thankful for in obviously negative things like miscarriage and infertility. It is all about perspective, you are so right!

    Thanks for linking up with us!

    1. Author

      Joy, thanks for your comment. I enjoyed this link-up and will be back. (What a lovely name you have!)

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