Even as I’ve been going through it, even when it has hurt deeply, I’ve felt fascinated by the grief process. Grief doesn’t come in a box marked: “Sad all the time. ” In the first few days after my father’s death, when my sisters, mother and I were together, it’s true we did a lot of crying. But we also … Read More
Let Go of Trying to be Better Than Your Parents
This post was originally published on my Inquiring Parent blog on Sep 10, 2013, and was updated on April 26, 2018. In the weeks before my father died, we had many conversations. Sometimes, he expressed regrets. He hinted that my sister and I had done better at parenting than he did. He thought he’d done things that weren’t kind; he … Read More
Let Go of Guilt and Shame
Guilt and shame are insidous feelings, hard to spot and sometimes also hard to stop. First, it helps to understand why we feel guilt – what we unconsciously hope to get from it and why we won’t ever get that. For me, understanding that felt like permission to treat myself with more kindness. If you struggle with guilt or shame, … Read More
Guest Post at I am The Milk
Today one of my articles on the early days after our second daughter was born prematurely is featured on Katia Bishofs blog: I am the Milk. Katia’s Donate a Post series features blog posts by women who have struggled with infertility or pregnancy loss or other difficulties during pregnancy.
Not Crying Over Spilt Milk
When we are present discipline isn’t even an issue, whereas when we are distracted by beliefs about how children should be life becomes a battle of wills, an endless task of trying to mould children into whatever they currently are not! Being present, aware, awake – whatever you like to call it – is something I sometimes am, and sometimes … Read More
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