New Year – Time to Celebrate or Reflect?

I might be alone in this, but New Year never seems a huge deal to me. Just because we switch the calendar from one number to another, why does that give license to burn thousands of pounds (or dollars) of fireworks? And what is the deal with getting so drunk you don’t even remember seeing those fireworks? Okay, so I’m … Read More

60 Mothers Say “So Glad They Told Me”

So often parenting is seen as a competitive sport. If there was a Parenting Olympics, the medals would go to those more skilled in: Bitchiness, Giving Useless Advice, Giving Unwanted Advice, Doling Out Put-Downs (Disguised as Super-Helpful Advice, with an extra medal of extremely clever disguises), Showing Other Parents Why You Do It Right and They Do It Wrong, In … Read More

I am who I am because…

More and more these days, I’m not sure who I am. I don’t mean I’ve forgotten the name written on my birth certificate (not even the middle name I’d rather forget.) I even (usually) manage to remember that I have another name for the Health Services – the same surname as my husband and kids, which I never use for anything … Read More

Book Review: Parenting With Purpose by Nina Garcia

I hadn’t got far into Parenting with Purpose before I knew that I was going to like it. In the first page of her introduction, Nina Garcia says: “We’ve got this discipline thing all wrong. We assume discipline is about punishment… We mistakenly believe that the main purpose of discipline is to stop tantrums at all costs, as quickly as possible.” … Read More

When You Think You Can’t Forgive

Do you find it hard to forgive? You aren’t alone. Many people feel the same way, and some psychologists even say our brains are hard-wired not to forgive as a way to protect ourselves from perceived danger. Yet, even if this is true in the short term, several studies have shown that long-term effects of being unable to forgive could … Read More

Life Lessons From a Cat #1000Speak

Yesterday was Sunday, yet Amazon’s delivery company was working overtime and a parcel arrived. It contained gifts from friends halfway round the world. I took the packages out and put them beside the others by our tree, and then I went back to working on a post I was writing for our 1000VoicesSpeak blog. My husband brought a cup of … Read More

We Meet in Emotions

Saturday would have been my father’s birthday. Would have been: in those three words you know something of how I felt yesterday and feel today. As you read my opening sentence, you probably remembered the people who have gone from your life, and whose leaving still causes you, at times, to feel a lump in your throat and prickling behind … Read More

Make Friends With Your Inner Bully

“People who feel shame and self-judgement are more likely to blame others for their moral failures.” So says, Kristin Neff in her book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. Neff is a professor at the University of Texas, and has spent over a decade studying the effects of having or not having self-compassion. She says that anger … Read More

(Un)Helpful Advice For a Quiet Writer (and Some Other Stuff)

I am not exactly the world’s best at self-promoting or of pushing myself forward. It used to be shyness that stopped me, way back in teenage days. Shyness being a term to describe quiet people with noisy minds – minds that chatter away saying: “They won’t like you if you say that.” And, “You’ll look like a fool if you … Read More

Believe in Love, Not in Powerlessness

My elder daughter and I are standing at traffic lights, waiting to cross the road. I look down at her – small for a six-year-old – and a huge wave of joy and gratitude for her existence washes over me. She looks up, smiles and says, “I know.” “What do you know?” I ask. (Though really, I know what she’s … Read More